First Day of Our New Life
Today was the first day that I was at home with both kids by myself. To be honest, I was pretty terrified about it last night, but was relieved that we all survived. You may have noticed the lack of updates since announcing that Soren arrived. I have been thinking about the birth experience over the past few weeks and want to really write about it in detail--not so much for all of you, but more for me. I know that it could be a while before I have time to properly sit down and write/type it out. But I do have a highlighted version for you that I wrote for a friend from my birthing class. I will post that after this.
What you don't know since I haven't shared the details of the birth is that we had a few complications in my recovery. I suffered a 2nd degree tear during the birth and was promptly stitched up in the delivery room. I was shocked by the pain I had after the birth, but it became unbearable just a few days after we got home. I had to go back to my OB to have my stitches examined; at the time, she said they looked 'okay', but wanted me to come back in a week to make sure I didn't develop an infection. Upon my return for my checkup, feeling much better, by the way, my OB was rather displeased at what she saw. I did indeed develop an infection and was put on antibiotics 3x/day for a week. And my feeling better began to go down hill rather quickly. My body apparently reacted quite negatively to the stitches, causing them to not only dissolve too early, resulting in things not staying together, but also to have pockets of infection develop around them. My OB brought me back 5 days later to check things out, which was yesterday. Ideally, she had planned to restitch me, but it turns out that the antibiotics are working, but not fast enough. We will try again on Friday. All of this to say...I'm still in a bit of pain and can't be on my feet too much. So, while you might think that I should be well on my way to being 100% after having the vaginal birth, unfortunately, I'm still in a state of limbo. And it kind of sucks. Add that to a newborn that generally wakes every 1.5 hours to eat at night, and I'm not in the greatest shape.
Add to my physical condition, a rather touchy 2. 5 year old. She has done really wonderfully with the Grandmas here helping out, but now that they are gone, she is definitely noticing the lack of one on one attention. Both Stephan and I feel badly about this, but are trying to give her as much as we can and overlook the tantrum-y toddler behavior. This part, at least, should definitely improve as we get better at dividing our time.
Add to my physical condition and Eisley's state, the very difficult state that Soren is in. While he is a sweet, big baby boy, he has had some really tough breaks since coming into this world. For some reason, our kids have very sensitive tummies and butts. He probably started his diaper rash before we got out of the hospital...could have something to do with the amount of poopy diapers he had! But after a week or so, things started to go downhill quickly. And after I got on antibiotics, I had to take him to the pediatrician for the most atrocious diaper rash. We had been trying all of the tricks that we knew, but he was so completely raw and literally, screamed and squealed with every diaper change. It was and still is heartbreaking. He is showing very minimal progress with our 2 prescription ointments we have been using since Friday. Plus, he is now bleeding off and on. In addition to the torturous diaper changes, Soren is also dealing with a great deal of tummy issues. He gets a lot of air in his tummy from eating, crying and possibly my milk. I cut out dairy last week in hopes of improving his condition, but I think the antibiotics maybe be making it worse. But he seems to be in great pain when he poops and even before it happens. And he often takes a few tries, so after 3 diapers in an hour and an inordinate amount of spit up, he finally settles down. Oh yes, Eisley had reflux, but this kid is going through almost 3 dozen burp cloths a day. His poor immature digestive system!! I'm praying that once I finish the treatment that he will show signs of improvement with both is tummy and diaper rash.
All of this to help you understand this first day. After getting little sleep last night, I woke at 6:30 to feed Soren. And while I would have hoped that he went right back to sleep, as he often does at this time, he didn't. It took me an hour to settle him down after his dirty diaper, spitting up, and eating. I got in another 30-45 minutes of sleep, but Eisley woke up around 8:00 (even though she didn't go to sleep until after 10:00pm!!). It was a struggle to get to Eisley by 9:00, and when I did get into her room, I had to walk in with Soren screaming because he was not happy. In fact, it seems that when he is awake lately he is crying and fussy. It's getting a bit tough to handle, to be honest, especially when you're trying to address the needs of another child, not to mention trying to find time to take care of yourself.
The good news is that I did get dressed, I washed my face, brushed my teeth and even had breakfast before noon. I put several loads of laundry through--the many clothes and burp cloths covered in spit up and pee (hello boy diaper changes!), plus all of the cloth wipes we use for diaper changes. I even called the nurse about Soren's diaper rash. But then there was the moment when Eisley got in her chair for lunch and I noticed that her diaper was so full that pee was coming out the top. Super. Just when I thought I was on top of things.
And then there was the unnecessary trauma caused by her dad, who decided to cut the ribbon off of a mylar balloon that was low on helium. It had been floating around the house, and right around lunchtime found its way to the fan by the dining room table. Eisley was extremely upset that the balloon was being beat up by the fan. Literally hysterical and crying until I retrieved the balloon. Then I had to feed her lunch because she wouldn't take her hands off of the balloon. Thankfully, Soren was sleeping.
Before you chastise me for doing too much, I did rest on the couch while Eisley was "resting" and Soren was sleeping. And thanks to meals in our freezer, dinner was simply prepared in the oven. What you can chastise me for is that I am up at 11:00 typing all of this. What can I say...it's NCIS night and we have a hard time waiting to watch it. Plus, it seems that every time I try to break away, the little man wakes up and needs a snack. But I do feel better that I have been able to update you a little bit on where we are at.
Of course, we are counting the days until my parents come back to visit!
What you don't know since I haven't shared the details of the birth is that we had a few complications in my recovery. I suffered a 2nd degree tear during the birth and was promptly stitched up in the delivery room. I was shocked by the pain I had after the birth, but it became unbearable just a few days after we got home. I had to go back to my OB to have my stitches examined; at the time, she said they looked 'okay', but wanted me to come back in a week to make sure I didn't develop an infection. Upon my return for my checkup, feeling much better, by the way, my OB was rather displeased at what she saw. I did indeed develop an infection and was put on antibiotics 3x/day for a week. And my feeling better began to go down hill rather quickly. My body apparently reacted quite negatively to the stitches, causing them to not only dissolve too early, resulting in things not staying together, but also to have pockets of infection develop around them. My OB brought me back 5 days later to check things out, which was yesterday. Ideally, she had planned to restitch me, but it turns out that the antibiotics are working, but not fast enough. We will try again on Friday. All of this to say...I'm still in a bit of pain and can't be on my feet too much. So, while you might think that I should be well on my way to being 100% after having the vaginal birth, unfortunately, I'm still in a state of limbo. And it kind of sucks. Add that to a newborn that generally wakes every 1.5 hours to eat at night, and I'm not in the greatest shape.
Add to my physical condition, a rather touchy 2. 5 year old. She has done really wonderfully with the Grandmas here helping out, but now that they are gone, she is definitely noticing the lack of one on one attention. Both Stephan and I feel badly about this, but are trying to give her as much as we can and overlook the tantrum-y toddler behavior. This part, at least, should definitely improve as we get better at dividing our time.
Add to my physical condition and Eisley's state, the very difficult state that Soren is in. While he is a sweet, big baby boy, he has had some really tough breaks since coming into this world. For some reason, our kids have very sensitive tummies and butts. He probably started his diaper rash before we got out of the hospital...could have something to do with the amount of poopy diapers he had! But after a week or so, things started to go downhill quickly. And after I got on antibiotics, I had to take him to the pediatrician for the most atrocious diaper rash. We had been trying all of the tricks that we knew, but he was so completely raw and literally, screamed and squealed with every diaper change. It was and still is heartbreaking. He is showing very minimal progress with our 2 prescription ointments we have been using since Friday. Plus, he is now bleeding off and on. In addition to the torturous diaper changes, Soren is also dealing with a great deal of tummy issues. He gets a lot of air in his tummy from eating, crying and possibly my milk. I cut out dairy last week in hopes of improving his condition, but I think the antibiotics maybe be making it worse. But he seems to be in great pain when he poops and even before it happens. And he often takes a few tries, so after 3 diapers in an hour and an inordinate amount of spit up, he finally settles down. Oh yes, Eisley had reflux, but this kid is going through almost 3 dozen burp cloths a day. His poor immature digestive system!! I'm praying that once I finish the treatment that he will show signs of improvement with both is tummy and diaper rash.
All of this to help you understand this first day. After getting little sleep last night, I woke at 6:30 to feed Soren. And while I would have hoped that he went right back to sleep, as he often does at this time, he didn't. It took me an hour to settle him down after his dirty diaper, spitting up, and eating. I got in another 30-45 minutes of sleep, but Eisley woke up around 8:00 (even though she didn't go to sleep until after 10:00pm!!). It was a struggle to get to Eisley by 9:00, and when I did get into her room, I had to walk in with Soren screaming because he was not happy. In fact, it seems that when he is awake lately he is crying and fussy. It's getting a bit tough to handle, to be honest, especially when you're trying to address the needs of another child, not to mention trying to find time to take care of yourself.
The good news is that I did get dressed, I washed my face, brushed my teeth and even had breakfast before noon. I put several loads of laundry through--the many clothes and burp cloths covered in spit up and pee (hello boy diaper changes!), plus all of the cloth wipes we use for diaper changes. I even called the nurse about Soren's diaper rash. But then there was the moment when Eisley got in her chair for lunch and I noticed that her diaper was so full that pee was coming out the top. Super. Just when I thought I was on top of things.
And then there was the unnecessary trauma caused by her dad, who decided to cut the ribbon off of a mylar balloon that was low on helium. It had been floating around the house, and right around lunchtime found its way to the fan by the dining room table. Eisley was extremely upset that the balloon was being beat up by the fan. Literally hysterical and crying until I retrieved the balloon. Then I had to feed her lunch because she wouldn't take her hands off of the balloon. Thankfully, Soren was sleeping.
Before you chastise me for doing too much, I did rest on the couch while Eisley was "resting" and Soren was sleeping. And thanks to meals in our freezer, dinner was simply prepared in the oven. What you can chastise me for is that I am up at 11:00 typing all of this. What can I say...it's NCIS night and we have a hard time waiting to watch it. Plus, it seems that every time I try to break away, the little man wakes up and needs a snack. But I do feel better that I have been able to update you a little bit on where we are at.
Of course, we are counting the days until my parents come back to visit!
So sorry Bekah. My heart goes out to you. Going from one to two kids totally rocked our world so I can relate, Isaiah had his stomach issues and jaundice and i had mastitis and other issues and you have more than one little life to take care of...it is total madness.
ReplyDeleteWith that in mind I must say you are doing amazing. My 2nd born is 1 year old and some days I am not as productive as you were today. The beginning is all about surviving, seriously. You will get in a groove later, it really is ok to procrastinate all of that. When you add a second child each parent will have to step up and do more and both of you will have to lower your standards in terms of household expectations. Don't worry about doing laundry, just feed yourself and the kids and change diapers. And then REST!
The first 6 weeks are the hardest. It will get better. It can take up to 3 weeks for dairy to be totally out of your system and you might see an improvement after that time. You will not be able to give Eisley the attention you have given her in the past and she will adjust to that, don't worry too much. Hang in there! You are an awesome mom!!
Stephan, it might not be a bad idea to show up from work with a bottle of wine :-) (and be ready to do a load of laundry :-) )
hugs and congratulations!!!
-shayla